doug laidlaw

I am just coming up from having "hit bottom" again. (Some of this may be a
repetition.)

I seem to have a monthly cycle (approximately.) My pdoc believes that the
moon is responsible. If it is, I can't do anything about the moon.

My own theory, which may get back to the moon, is a modified theory of
biorhythms. The strict theory of biorhythms claims that all of us,
regardless of gender, race, culture, illness or pregnancy, have the same
cycles which start from the day we were born. On a graph, the day we were
born is zero, and they all go positive then swing negative. There are
three cycles - physical (23 days) emotional (28 days) and intellectual (33
days from memory.) The days when a graph crosses zero are "critical days"
and it is claimed that Japanese airline pilots are not allowed to fly on
their critical days. The person who first told me about it had a watch
with her cycles on 3 rotating scales, but warned me not to take it too
literally.

In my view, such a rigid scheme is contrary to human nature, but I am quite
willing to admit that there is "something in it." They thought up this
scheme from observations, i.e. data. My approximate monthly emotional
cycle seems consistent with a more reasonable, more flexible pattern.

On 21 January, I moved to a Retirement Village. On 23 January my mother
passed away. She was the last of the four (my and my wife's parents) and
so my last link with that generation. My pdoc says that those two events
were top stressors, and with both occurring so close together, I can expect
to be having a rough time. Neither event is in the official "Top
10" (the*Holmes-Rahe*stress scale -
http://www.workshopsinc.com/manual/Ch6H2.html), but similar ones are there.
My medication has been increased.

At least I have a sensible explanation. I try not to waste energy in
senseless contest with what has to be, but to accept it and do the best I
can, given the cir***stances.

Doug.
--
ICQ Number 178748389. Registered Linux User No. 277548.
Here lies one who meant well, tried a little, failed much:-
surely that may be his epitaph, of which he need not be ashamed.
-R.L. Stevenson.

christina peterson

Bio-rhythms were quite the thing back 30 or 35 years ago. They are based
partly on the magnetic pull of heavenly bodies (like horoscopes) and
especially the moon which is closest, and on circadian rhythms, and also on
some hormonal cycles.

If I remember correctly, there are several sets. They are established
through "bio-feed-back" monitoring, and can actually vary from the 28 days.
I remember about that variation in days, because my menstrual cycle was 34
days. It is said that men can be more effected by their 28 day cycle than
women.

And to my understanding, the cycles can get re-set, especially by physical
and emotional traumas. In addition, a hormonal cycle can adapt to someone
else's cycle, as women's periods can. You think we're all on the rag at
once? Well, there's some truth in it. Within a group of women (eg, an
office, a barracks, sometimes room-mates or a household) menstrual cycles
will very often somewhat align themselves with that of the alpha female.

But those are major stressors you've just been through too. The retirement
village thing includes the packing and moving, changing communities,
changing social norms/values/patterns/rhythms, as well as getting used to
new rooms, and new ways to think of your role in society.

I'm sorry to hear about your mother's passing. Were you able to take time
to be with her? Boy! Speaking of differences between how men and women do
things! It is usual with women to talk each other through processes like
the loss of a parent. Of course, there is also more expectation on women to
take care of dying parents.

I was fortunate, with the loss of my father. He gave us the gift of a good
death. He lived the end of his life on his own terms -- with reasonable
health, without pain or hospitalization, at home, with his business not only
in order but on the table, and with his family around. I was also fortunate
to be able to spend quite a bit of time with him, and to have paid
attendants as well as other siblings to share caring for him. I believe my
father's end was comfortable for him emotionally and spiritually, and that
he took that step from one journey to the next with peace.

My condolences for your mother. And this is a proper place to talk about it
if you wish.

You are smart not to rail against "what is", and rhythms that won't change.
People talk about "fighting Depression", but I think it's more effective to
work with, than to fight against.

Take care,

Tina

doug laidlaw

Thanks Tina, Yes, it was in about the late 70's that I was introduced to
biorhythms by a colleague. What I won't accept is that they are so rigid.
All the books said that everyone on this planet, regardless of race,
gender, or health, has exactly the same rhythm. That isn't natural.

No, we are in Bendigo, and both our families are in Geelong, abiout 3-1/2
hours' drive away. Jenny's mother collapsed suddenly with a massive
stroke, and was in a coma all the time we were there. They were just
keeping her comfortable. My mother started having a series of heart
attacks. We saw her after one, then she said that the change of medication
was bringing her blood pressure right down and making her feel fine. My
brother couldn't see that things were getting worse till I pointed them
out. Then, on the week-end that we moved here, she was admitted again. She
asked the family not to tell us. On the Sunday night we got the message
that she had died.

You are right about men not networking about these things. It is covered in
Terry Real's book "I Don't Want to Talk about it."

I posted to ASM as well and got this reply:

"There is no reason for you to put up with monthly depression.**A*good*
endocrinologist can regulate your menstrual cycle, or there are many
decent anti-depressant medications available.**You*have*enough*going*on*
in your life without being totally disfunctional.**Take*a*pill."

Probably well-intentioned, and not claiming to know enough to make a
specific suggestion, but obviously thinks that depression is a female
thing. Fortunately a more understanding woman answered him. According to
Terry Real, it is part of the male ethic that it is "unmanly" to admit any
weakness, particularly depression. My father saw it as weakness of
character. I like people who adopt the approach of the reply, more one of
pointing me in the right direction. So many on ASM are more definite in
their recommended action, without knowing enough background. It is what
they would do, and their own cir***stances are completely different.

Doug.

--
ICQ Number 178748389. Registered Linux User No. 277548.
It takes both sunshine and rain to make a rainbow.
- Caption to a motivational picture.

jon g.

Don't even try and understand,
Just find a place and make a stand... (biorhythmes)
And take it easy