frojd2000

Just to admitt that you have a serious problem with your mentalhealth
and why
your world have gone down is a hard to face fact,I think that
social-phobia is
so hard to treat cause you have been developing it for so many years
8-20 thats 12 years off learning the hard way that sometimes its just
better to shut up that to scream,I think that after breaking down as
bad as you have pretty much have beecome a total stranger to yourself
today 12 years since i cracked I have become more like a 5 year old
terrified off people and society
alianated to my family,I think that was one off the most terryfing
feelings that come to me was that my family had become strangers to
me,so I think that when your entire fundament off safety and beleaves
just crackes under your feet
it`s almost to late and when psychiatry just cant give that much hope
what is left besides fear and hopelesness not that much if you ask
me..when things have
gone that bad as you dont even find the words to explain where it
started and that your in so much defense and scared to be further hurt
by the shrinks willing to point out your flaws,when your 20years and
you just have to keep up and be masculin look good be tuff and all its
extreamly hard to face that
your cracking up and have become kind off defensless,I think CBT works
so much better when you have just got over the worst scenarious and
developed some social skills I beleave that trying to be objetive and
distansing and all
not take things personally is skills we allready know and its
ingrained in our
unconsiosness so its nothing new about it we all distance to some
degree or else we wold have gone down before age 10,but to be honest I
would like to have some safety back so I could get closer to people,in
crisis distance is good but when you figure out that even when you try
to stay in the game without getting to much humiliation and hostility
against you and just fail to fit in and isolation is the only
option,sometimes it just feels so stupid to try again I mean we are
smart people live and learn pain vs pleasure I cant say that I am that
motivated at even try to have a personal relation to people anymore I
am an open wound that just cant heal and my basic skills lacks,to
build a house you need the hammer a saw,nails and wood and also the
skills to build if some off it just is not there you will end up like
a person who really wants a house but just cant make it right,Its like
when I have come close to even make sence and socialize better the
damned thing kicks back,its
like when I in 98 went trough grouptherapy and in the end off the 16
weeks somewhat made progress and felt closer to the group members I
kind off felt better more integrated less hostile and happier and the
group was over it only took some weeks to relapse again,its like you
have been on a high and realy hope that you can get the education you
allways have talked about but you face the reality off not having that
many friends left depression and anxiety hits
you like a hammer,that was years ago and most off my life after that I
have
kept to myself and lived in my own world I would realy like to feel
some joy again maybe go out and just chill have a bear and mingle with
the happy people on the dancefloor and just have fun,but the last time
i tried to do that with a friend off mine it just felt bad and
hopeless,sometimes it just makes the pain even worse i think

runchierun

Hi there, I just read your post and I think you could be very right about group
therapy being good company and feeling like you were belonging to something
that really felt like you were all on the same boat and safe. But i think
group therapy is a real waste of time and maybe it wasnt for me. I went to a
Theraputic Community for a while and I felt like it was really dumb and stupid
talking about nothing in the talk sessions. It wasnt right for me.

But I think that CBT is more of a thing to help with the automatic thinking
where you might think you are making a fool of yourself in company and in
actual fact you are communicating very well. (that was just an example)

The other day there was a post about Highly Sensitive People have you read it.
This is extremely inspiring because once you read this you might find out that
you are not socially phobic at all. In fact you might just be one of the
special types where you are highly sensitive to others and live in a place
where there is a huge inner world. You might think i sound cucckoo but i am
soo glad i read this and ordered the book cause all my life i felt soooo
different to others and felt they were right insensitive and i thoroughly
believed that i was a failure and got really depressed and couldnt talk to
people without feeling a million different things and always felt people were
slaying me and stripping lengths of me just in the middle of a simple chat. It
felt awful and i truely believed i was social phobic but now i realise i am not
phobic but only highly sensitive and this makes me happy. I hope it does with
you too.

If you are highly sensitive you might have a vast imagination, be very
creative, love beautiful things and have a great respect for music films and
artwork. You might be shy and sensitive, more so than the average person.
Little freinds, but bonds thick and fast to one or two people. Needs time
alone everyday to be with your thoughts. Have very vivid clear dreams and the
same for daydreams. Live in a dreamworld basically cause the real world is
harsh and cold.

Try the site for yourself - www.highlysensitivepeople.com

Regards Karen

grigoruk89

are you good at sports? are you attractive?

runchierun

yes i am and yes i am

True and true