whisper

the book that is....


After seeing several recommendations from this news group and from our
marriage counselor.. I bought the book and I am currently reading it..

Has any one actually done the things the book talks about?

Kass
trying to let the book "soak in"


--
Kassandra M Young
Orient Electric Inc
30532 SE Bluff Rd
Gresham OR 97080
503-663-5881
kass.young@verizon.net

seeker

What things? Other than the hugging-until-exhausted (or whatever it's
called) I didn't see anything that would seem to call for that kind of
a queston. (To answer it, though, no, I haven't. which is why my wife
and I are in joint therapy!)

Ted

doug anderson

Seeker <anon-30263@anon.twwells.com> writes:

There are a bunch of other things. Making love while looking into
each others eyes for example.

tai

Kass, it's one of the few relationship self-help books I've found to 'speak
to me' but a large part of that is because what he suggests actually works
for me and my husband and always did. I even managed to get my husband to
read it and he found it interesting too. Unlike Gray's Mars/Venus generic
female that I couldn't identify with at all, Schnarch concentrates more on
individual differences between spouses.

I sometimes joke about the eyes-open *** and ****** he promotes but if a
couple isn't doing that already for some part of their lovemaking (or
avoiding it altogether) it's a good practice to work on for them.

However, I actually found his concept of 'differentiation' most useful in
looking at my relationship with my husband. By each partner making
him/herself stronger, the marital relationship grows stronger. Schnarch
covers a lot of ground and some areas will be more valuable to read for some
couples than others. Havre you read about "gridlock", yet? I found that a
useful concept, too.

Tai

shinypenny0001

What she said!

I loved the book, too, but am too depressed about the conjoined twins
dying in surgery to write about it. Remember that anecdote in the
book?

jen

whisper

I too find it "calling me".. but its a lot to take in...I am on "two choice
dilemma" right now

As for the eyes open love making...I have had that kind of experience he
talks about.. (but not with DH).. it was the most amazing thing I have ever
experienced..unfortunately the person it happened with is the guy that
totally crushed me emotionally..so I have had a very hard time "allowing"
myself to be that open again...( one of the reasons DH and I are in
counseling)

I tired the venus/mars book.. couldn't get through the intro..lol


Thanks for the info...DH is going to read it when I am done.. will be
interesting to see/hear his perspective..compared to mine

Kass