Hi,

Firstly, let me apologise for cross posting this email, but this is
definitely on topic and hopefully with enough exposure should be of great
help to the diabetic people of the UK.

My name is Darren and my daughter was diagnosed type 1 in February this
year. Don't ask me how we're doing - it's kind of a rollercoaster ride but
overall I think we are riding pretty well. My own personal anguish has been
feeling like I am unable to do anything more than just be there to help my
daughter. Guilt? For those parents who have kids with diabetes you will
know this one. On the good days - you are fully aware that you are not to
blame and it is just one of life's unfortunate things.... on the bad
days.... you try to blame yourself, you want to take this condition away or
least do what you can to ease things right? Part of our step to
understanding and living with diabetes has been to call upon the wonderful
support available at Diabetes UK as well as our local support group. Our
local diabetic care is actually with good considering we do not have a
dedicated diabetic nurse due to staffing problems (this will change soon -
we are hoping!). As a result we are leaning on out local support group a
lot and they have been very helpful to us.

We continue living with diabetes and growing stronger in dealing with the
problems that arise but in a bid to do more to help - help the support and
resources available and the research into a better future, I have set up
collections campaign (associated with recyclingappeal.com) and I want your
rubbish! - well your old printer cartridges and toners as well as any old
mobile phones you are just going to throw away.

It won't cost you a thing! -

If you or your business wish to help, I can send you some FREEPOST address
bags which will accept about 6 items or if you are able to collect 20
or more items, I can arrange FREE courier collection.

If you can help - that would be really great. Each item, depending on make,
can raise up to £4.50 each. You may be going to throw these out anyway, so
why not help support a good cause as well as help the environment instead!

Please email me at info@connect2biz.co.uk if you are able to help or to find
out more. I have put these details on my own comapny website
www.connect2biz.co.uk so you can find out a little more.

I have arranged with recyclingappeal.com that monies raised will be split
between Diabetes UK and our local support group and cheques are paid direct
to them.

I hope that nobody is offended by my post or take this as spam. This is
totally genuine. Should you have any questions please let me know.

Thanks
Darren

On Fri, 24 Oct 2003 12:46:59 +0100, Darren used
<bnbuj0$3k1$1@newsg1.svr.pol.co.uk> to say...

Now I don't know about anyone else, but isn't this a tad overkill? It
isn't like it's the end of the world.

Perhaps I'm being a tad too cynical?

Hi,

I know it's not the end of the world, far from it. My daughter is 8 now.
Back in February when diagnosed, she had collapsed, very close to coma - at
the time.... this really was bad. Ever since, we have been dealing day to
day and my daughter is doing extremely well, managing her own injections and
asking questions on her worries. We do have bad days though - surely that's
understandable? We recently attended a family support weekend and the tears
we saw and shared there certainly indicated that feeling guilty that somehow
you may have inflicted this on your own child was something that many
parents had at least felt at some point. As said though, these feelings are
on our bad days which are getting fewer now but do still occur. On the
other 'good' days we think straight and know full well that it is all just
part of life and not the end of the world. And rollercoaster is pretty
true - my daughter has really positive days but occasionally she just cries
and cries, again this is improving but heartbreaking for us to watch.

As I am still learning lots and wanting to do what I can to support the
cause, the collection idea came about, I myself, throw many cartridges away
and thought I may as well do something simple like this to generate some
fundraising. It also giving my daughter something to focus on. She has her
school involved, and a collection bin there which is good. It is all new
but we have raised over £60 so far and until now I have not done any
promotion. I knew that once I started approaching the web, it may look like
spam but it sure isn't. And since the monies I raise split between DUK and
out local group some people may not want to help...but there's nothing
stopping them doing something similar and setting up an account to raise
money for their local support groups. It's all very simple.....the people
at recyclingappeal.com collect your cartridges etc free and send cheques,
payable to whom you set up.

Am happy to discuss anything further with anyone, on or off the group.

Thanks
Darren

NB top posting corrected.

On Sat, 25 Oct 2003 15:37:43 +0100, Darren used
<bne1rr$d18$1@news7.svr.pol.co.uk> to say...

As a parent I do actually understand what you say, but as a diabetic I
believe that your (perfectly natural, but preventable) attitude is
somewhat self-defeating.

Kids are very sensitive receivers of subliminal information, i.e. your,
for want of a better expression, panic and self blame will be picked up
by your daughter. I believe this would distress her far more than any
symptoms she may have.

Don't forget that kids are far more resilient than us adults, to her
having upset parents would be far more devastating. Diabetes is not a
life sentence, and as an 8 year old she is far better able to handle the
change in lifestyle than us older pharts.

I totally understand the devastation that this can cause to any caring
parent, but I also understand that you shouldn't communicate any of that
to a young child. You may be upset that your young daughter is diabetic,
whereas she is more than likely feeling rotten physically (which kids
cope with better than adults anyway) but hugely upset because you are.

I didn't mean to be over-critical. I know what it's like to have a child
who is ill, but please do yourself, and more importantly your daughter,
a favour and lighten up a bit. You will find that within a few months
she will be behaving as if all the paraphenalia, lifestyle change,
hospital visits etc are perfectly normal.

As the ads say, don't turn a drama into a crisis.


An admirable cause, but I'm not sure you are doing it for the right
reasons. Not that either it or my opinion matters.


You can make things easier for them to discuss by not top posting

Darren I have a daughter with diabetes she is nine years old. I run an
email support group for UK parents. It is hosted through the
ChildrenwithDiabetes US web site.

I hope you don't mind me saying, but I don't think it was a good idea to
post your original message on a newsgroup, where no one knows who you are.
There are far too many spam and scams mails on newsgroups, and this sort of
thing, from someone no one knows is viewed with suspicion, however admirable
your scheme is. I hope I haven't offended you. This is probably why you
have received few replies or not very sympatric ones. Also cross posting to
other groups does not go down well, as it causes confusion and people
immediately think that it is a scam. If you are interested in more
information about subscribing to the UK parents of children with diabetes I
can give you more information or you can go to the website and subscribe. I
wouldn't post on alt.support diabetes kids, as its always full of crap post,
spam and porn. Very very rarely a parent posts there.

http://www.childrenwithdiabetes.com/...ilinglists.htm

Geographical Mailing Lists
Families in the United Kingdom.

We went to a DUK weekend a few weeks ago at Market Bosworth. It was great
to meet other parents who were going through the same thing. Good for the
kids not to keep having to explain to new friends what they are doing when
they do blood test etc. So nice not explaining all the time about what
diabetes involves. Seeing that you are not the only one.

So if you want further support come and subscribe to the UK support group,
if you have any problems, mail me.

Jackie
Mum of twins Sasha and Beckie age 9 Beckie non D

Hi Jackie,

Thanks for the email.

Looking back to my original post, it is easier to see how it may deem to
appear like spam. So very difficult though - the minute you write... this
is not spam.....or this is genuine.... it pretty much indicates it is
junk! - which this is not!

The intention really was to make people aware that recyling old cartridges
etc can benefit us rather than throwing them out. I started with an
introduction which I wanted to make so that people would see that I was
genuine. Again looking back it does kind of read like one of those junk
mails about 'my great uncle jack has died and has left masses of cash but I
need you help to get it....etc...'. In the words of the great
Homer.....'DOH!'. Thought some of references to DUK and our local care
might have shown it to be more true though? - never mind now though!

The reality is, yes I am genuine. My daughter was diagnosed in Feb this
year. DUK have been great. Our local care has been good - at the level
that is available - our nurse is on a career break and I think won't be back
so the post will be advertised shortly. We gain a lot of support from our
local support group and from contacts we have made there. We have
experienced some very bad days - but to be honest I feel this is pretty
understandable and from meeting other newly diagnosed parents at a recent
weekend I know we are not on our own and this was an invaluble experience
for us. My daughter has moodswings like I could only imagine of a
teenager. One instance where her behaviour was just so bad (and this is not
normal for her) and she really did have a major paddy but then in the breath
before calming down she just broke down and cried her heart out. I know
that living with diabetes is not that big a deal. But adjustment time does
need to be given and allowed for. I know that say in 12 months time, we
ourselves will look back and wonder what we fussed so much about..... it's
just that some of the current days it is more difficult to see things that
clearly.
I have already signed up to several mailing lists and I think yours too -
there are some great people/families out there whom I have met and have
regular online contact with. The newsgroups was just another place I
read - though seem to be dominated more by US people so the blood levels and
talk about that I tend not to read about.

I do have a sense of not being able to do enough to help my daughter, DUK
and our local group which is why I looked around for some ideas... the
recycling scheme is free to setup and do, and really is an easy way to raise
money - we have local businesses involved and also the local school - all
this helps me too - which may not be the right reasons of doing it.... but
also is providing us contacts and good information sources. Any money I
raise goes direct to the cause - not via myself. Anyone who wanted to do
something similar could do something for their own local groups - or could
help by contacting me. and best of all - I am not asking for money off
anyone - just things they might normally throw away. For the last 2 months
I have just relied on word of mouth and have had a steady number of items
given to me. I thought I might try and step things up a gear and see where
I could try online. I just did the x-post newsgroups thing as a
trial.....oops! - I know better now! - but there we go. Need to get a bit
more up to speed with some of the netiquette.

Anyway better sign off now!

Thanks
Darren

Not that it matters but, if I was in the UK I'd send you my carts.
Good Luck!
--

--
t2_lurking
geabbottATabbottandabbottDOTcom
Do not mail to t2_lurking (auto-delete)
===============================
The Joy that isn't shared, I've heard,
dies young.
---- Anne Sexton ----

when


group,

Darren,

Jackie summed it up very well. I think in the ng we all get know each other,
so when a stranger rides into town unannounced there is a natural suspicion
that the High Plain Drifter has arrived and we tend to pack the wife and
kids into the cellar, swing the window shutters closed, and bolt the doors -
until the stranger moves on! :-)

Hope it all goes well with your collection scam (oops, sorry meant scheme
:-D). I'm pretty active in Diabetes UK myself. In March, I was appointed to
the lay advisory council, and as Ratty said at the time, that makes me the
ng shop steward. I can expect your subscription, then, eh? £200 should do
it...

Peter.


when


group,

Jackie,

you have me interested here. The Diabetes UK weekend is one of several that
they run at different places around the country, and is targeted at families
with diabetic kiddies? Intended to help kids get an an equal footing with
their peers, to help them appreciate and better prepare them for the
isolation that some of them have experienced in schools? Is that the
concept?

I remember meeting a young lady at the Diabetes UK conference in Birmingham
earlier this year, and she was totally passionate and nuts about those
weekends as she organises them. Her name escapes me. She stood up to give an
account of the previous year and she said if Diabetes UK ever do away with
those weekends, they will deny kids with diabetes from coming to terms with
one of the most valuable challenges they are likely to endure before
adulthood. I remember talking to her at the time, and I can see those
weekend getaways must be a riot of laughter and great fun!

Sorry I missed the plot!

Peter.

Darren

Well any time you feel like you need support from others in the same
situation look me up on the UK childrenwithdiabetes list, or contact me on
jackie.jacombs@childrenwithdiabetes.com
I don't think that in a years time you will wonder what all the fuss was
about, as unfortunately its like bringing up a baby, things don't really get
any easier, but just change. Diabetes interferes with so many aspects of
life fromschools, health to social situations it takes a lot of strength to
cope well with it. As a child changes and grows insulin needs are
constantly changing and insulin doses need seem to need adjusting every few
weeks. Diabetes hasn't stopped Sasha doing most of the things that she
wants but it does take quite a lot of planning ahead all the time. She also
doesn't go to sleepovers as I cant be certain she will be OK through the
night, as she has had frequent night time hypos and doesn't wake but goes
into a fit. I cant expect another parent to get up at 2.30am and test her
which is what we do now.
There are a lot of parents who find it very hard to come to terms with their
child's illness and parents who find they need extra support when their
teenage child is so busy living that diabetes care comes way down on the
list of their priorities.
Sasha is a bright, happy, energentic child, who sees the world through rose
coloured specs and her proverbial cup is always half full. Her identical
twin who is not D, but has a very high risk of developing D, is the opposite
and I dread the day if and when she does get diabetes, as I know it will be
a rough ride for us all.


Anyway good luck with the money making venture. See you around

Jackie Mum of Sasha aged 9


when


group,