kevin s. wilson

Thanks a bunch for the half-hearted attempt to design a politically
incorrect costume my wife could wear to the Halloween party. We gave
your suggestions all the consideration they deserved, then decided she
would go as a blonde joke.

Costume v1.0 was to wear a blonde wig and attach a string of condom
packets to her earrings. When people asked why she had condoms hanging
from her ears, she would say, "Because I don't want to get hearing
aids."

Costume v1.0 was scrapped after a short conversation in which I
remarked that some people don't believe condoms should be exposed to
the light of day, much less hang from people's ears. I then shared
with her the ****ns of the word "s***bag" and asked if she worked with
any conservative Catholics.

Costume v2.0 consists of a white apron, white cotton shirt, white
drawstring pants, and elbow-length rubber gloves. She wears a blonde
wig with a hair net, except the hair net only covers the very top of
her head, with blonde hair streaming out below. On the apron are the
dancing M&Ms and the following text:

M&M Factory
Production Line
Lead Proofreader

HAW! HAW!

--
Kevin S. Wilson
Tech Writer at a University Somewhere in Idaho
"You can safely ignore Kevin in order to
maximise life's experience." --A. Loon, in alt.religion.kibology

kevin s. wilson

<something incredibly amusing>

I forgot to mention that my wife has already forbidden me from
creating an iron-on transfer in such a way that the a dancing M&M
appears on each of her bqqbies. She also refuses to wear falsies so
that it appears she has great big bqqbies. Though I consider hers to
be just the right size--because they are hers--I think the great big
bqqbies emblazoned with dancing M&Ms are crucial to the success of
this costume.

--
Kevin S. Wilson
Tech Writer at a University Somewhere in Idaho
"You can safely ignore Kevin in order to
maximise life's experience." --A. Loon, in alt.religion.kibology

jeremy d. impson

Make sure she carries a bag full of M&M's. When asked, she should say
that it's full of W's.

--Jeremy

--

Jeremy Impson
jdimpson can be contacted at acm dot org
http://impson.tzo.com/~jdimpson

kevin s. wilson

HAW! HAW! Good won.

The apron has two big pockets, which we'll fill with Marshall
Matherses. Then she can pull out a fistful and use your joke, or she
can complain because her boss on the production line told her to
alphabetize all of the Marshall Matherses and she doesn't know whether
3 comes before E, W, or M.

HAW! I SAY HAW!

BTW, Jeremy, thanks for the e-mail about how you spent 22 hours
messing around with a pig's butt. Glad it turned out good for you, if
not for the pig. I'll write back tomorrow. Right now, I'm off in
search of T-shirt transfer paper and a hair net.

PS: How do you know your blonde girlfriend made chocolate chip
cookies?

spoiler space

The kitchen floor is littered with M&M shells.

--
Kevin S. Wilson
Tech Writer at a University Somewhere in Idaho
"You can safely ignore Kevin in order to
maximise life's experience." --A. Loon, in alt.religion.kibology

glenn knickerbocker

The capital of Wyoming!

¬R

swt

Kevin: Twenty-two hours? That seems like an awfully long time.

Jeremy: Yes...but what's time to a pig?

--
..:*~*:. .:*~*:. .:*~*:. .:*~*:. .:*~*:.
`*._.:*' :// `*._.:*' ers. `*._.:*' net/ `*._.:*'
..:*~*:. http .:*~*:. memb .:*~*:. cox. .:*~*:. swt2/ .:*~*:.
`*._.:*' `*._.:*' `*._.:*' `*._.:*'

glenn knickerbocker

EBCDIC RUINED MR S.WILSON"S COSTYOUME||!|

¬R

clement cherlin

Make sure that she tells everyone that she thinks it's a terrible waste,
all the Ws they have to throw out.


Indeed.

--
UPS, the UPS brandmark and the color brown are registered trademarks
of United Parcel Service of America, Inc. All rights reserved.
Printed on recycled paper.

kurt

The good ship alt.religion.kibology was dashed upon the rocks, killing all
on board but Kevin S. Wilson ...


Fixed.

--
Kurt *Kill the nospam to reply*

I get the impression you haven't worked out that you can't check out my
arse in cyberspace.
-- RGMW outtake